Someone says “Explain it in a way your grandmother would understand.”
I would ask them what they mean. I would explain that we often think of older women and mothers or grandmothers as not technological or intelligent, but this is a little absurd.
Someone says about an Asian woman “She looks so young; I can't believe she's a professor!”
I would probably mention a professional qualification of the person to explain that she got the job because of that. I might mention that describing her has ‘so young’ might be a compliment, but makes it seem like she isn’t competent.
Someone seems to frequently interrupt women when they are speaking.
A student says "You made me feel stupid for asking that question."
I would listen to them and make sure that they feel heard. I would say I was sorry. I would resist the urge to tell them " I didn’t mean to make you feel stupid." The impact of my words matters even if the impact doesn't align with my intentions.
Brenda doesn't speak up much during class. A TA says: "Brenda just needs to learn to be more confident."
I would say that when I hear that someone "needs to be more confident" it sounds like the person needs to be fixed. I would ask them if we might be able to change some of our culture in our classes so that people don’t have to display confidence to be successful.